Every now and then, an article comes to our attention that simply causes us to rub our eyes, and ask out loud, “REALLY”? One such article, a blog written by Zach Bowman for AutoBlog.com caused us to laugh out loud at the ignorance of his opening paragraph: “Body shops employ all kinds of sorcery when it comes to correcting crimes against sheetmetal. Their arsenal of tools is wide and varied and almost always includes a massive suction cup or two. You know, just like the powerful GoPro suction mount.”

Our first chuckle came from the notion that Mr. Bowman equates skill and artisanship to “sorcery”. I suppose to the extremely unskilled eye, whose formative years might have been heavily influenced by the fictional storytelling of J.K. Rowling, correcting “crimes against sheet metal” might indeed look like sorcery. We don’t know if he’s actually ever stepped foot into an authentic body shop before, but again we give credit to the possibility that his collision-industry experience could be limited to dropping off a damaged car, and picking it up after repairs have been completed. This too, could look very magical to the untrained eye.

One thing is absolutely certain. Here in the Magical Kingdom of Nylund’s Collision Center, we do not own a “massive suction cup or two”. In fact, the only cases where such low-tech, temporary bandage work is ever employed is for extremely light hail damage – and we don’t even do that. Instead, our magic wands look remarkably like specialized hammers, dollys and picks along with sanders, buffers and grinders. Oh yeah, Zach… don’t forget the wizards, all of whom were formally trained over the course of years to make their craft look like… yep… magic.

Every last ounce of Mr. Bowman’s credibility was sucked out of his own article when he wrote: “Don’t have a GoPro? Don’t sweat it. Depending on the size and location of your ding, you can pull off the same trick with a little water and an old-school toilet plunger.” A toilet plunger? Please.

Tell you what… we’ve provided the following video as a behind-the-curtain look at the real magic of what we do here at Nylund’s Collision Center. If ever your car is damaged, you clearly have a choice. You can call on Zach and ask him to bring his plunger, or you can call the wand-wielding, pointy-hat wearing folks at Nylund’s and we’ll make your car just like new.

Mr. Bowman’s blog has caused us to consider a new tagline: “We Don’t Suck”.

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